Walter passed away over Easter. He wasn't responding well to treatment; they tried to shrink his tumor but it was just getting bigger. He did die in his sleep which is just about the only good thing about the situation. He was cremated so there was no actual funeral, but the memorial was nice. I think it kind of helps that I didn't have to see him in a coffin. I don't know if I could have stood that.

I'm slowly tapering off the Lexapro. So far, it's been surprisingly easy. No scary withdrawal symptoms have popped up though I did feel a little nauseous in the beginning.

A weird thing is happening as I'm coming off this medication as well. I'm taking a lot less bullshit. In the normal course of a relationship, I suppose things change with time and you're no longer looking through those rose-colored glasses at each other, but for some reason it just feels different this time. Love can certainly feel disappointing. I was watching Wicker Park the other day, and I was so wrapped up in the story. I just couldn't help feeling that that's what I want. Someone to pine over me when I'm not around and make me feel like I'm a princess, like I'm the most important thing to them and they can't live without me. Yes, I realize it's a movie (with a very stalker-ish appeal as well) but some little part of me still believes that kind of love is possible. I just don't think Grant's it. I never really have, if I want to be honest with myself.